So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
