I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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