real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
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