im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
