is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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