i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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