i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Randomize