i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
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