that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
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