I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
Randomize
