"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Randomize
