i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Randomize
