At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
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