My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
Randomize
