no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
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Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
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I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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