i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
