i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Randomize
