Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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