just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
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it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
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Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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