u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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