we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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