16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I FOUND THE LEGS
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
