how hairy? two words: wookie tits
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
