More tranny stories later!
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
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