He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I had to cum in my sink.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
