Christians are straight up FREAKS
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
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