was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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