five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
