sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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