he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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