Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
