so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
