God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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