I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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