hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
