We're like a lot better than the average bears
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
