Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
