i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
When did angry sex become our thing?
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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