using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
