once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
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Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
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