Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
