he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
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I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I had to cum in my sink.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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