She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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