after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
