They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
i will never coherently bang her
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Randomize
