so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
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terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
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I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
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