Me. At least after what I've been through.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
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Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
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I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
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