Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.