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Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
So squirting runs in the family.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
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