Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
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When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
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HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
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