theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
How does one acquire holy water?
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize
