Someone shit on the floor
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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